I know exactly what you thought of because I thought of the same thing when I wrote this title! "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" - The bestseller by John Gray.
Men and women are different. Fact!
But neither are all men the same nor the women! Another fact. The one thing I absolutely detest is "generalisation" and "stereotyping"! We put everything into "boxes" and then want to think "out of the box"!
Mars is the Roman God of War. According to astrology,the positives of being governed by Mars are - highly energetic, passionate, confident, a warrior, brave and bold; on the flip side, aggression and violence in behaviour or conduct.
Venus, is the Roman Goddess of love and beauty. The positive effects of being governed by Venus is beauty, love, passion, art, dance, music,harmony, luxury, prosperity. The negatives being self-indulgence, materialism, vanity.
Out of the 12 zodiac signs, Mars rules Aries and Scorpio and Venus rules Taurus and Libra.
In my teens I was really interested in Astrology and I had literally memorised Linda Goodman( it's that age you know!) But after meeting Adit, I realised what I read should be taken with a pinch of salt! Why??Adit's sun sign is Aries and mine, Taurus- he is (literally) from Mars and I am from Venus😍Astrologically speaking, Aries and Taurus are totally incompatible! But, thankfully, I didn't believe everything that Goodman's book said!😊
The moment a baby is born, his/her gender is presumed to define him/her as a person. Boys are dressed up in blue and girls in pink. Boys will play with balls and guns, while girls will play house or with dolls. Boys will wear pants and girl dresses. The stereotyping begins!
There may be a boy who likes pink or a girl who likes blue. There would be boys who love cooking and girls who love football and not dolls. There may be girls who like wearing pants more than dresses and boys who love to dress up and put on make up (think models, actors, performers)! There may be boys who love Ballet and girls who love bikes!
Men may be from Mars but that doesn't mean it applies to every boy or man around us. The worst thing that ever happened to men is- "boys will be boys" and "boys don't cry". We denied them the freedom and right to express their true feelings the minute they were born. We denied them the opportunity to be what they want / like to be because 'boys will be boys'!!! We nipped their budding individuality and personality before it had a chance to bloom. Don't clip their wings before they learn to fly!
In Indian mythology we come across Ardhnarishwar , the composite androgynous form of Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati, which is depicted as half male and half female. The Greek counterpart being Dionysus - Bacchus in Roman mythology (see my daughter's blog on mythology).The Chinese concept of duality or Yin-Yang is similar.
Biologically , men and women have both testosterone and oestrogen in their bodies. Psychologically, each one of us has masculine and feminine traits.
The concept of acceptance of 'manly men' and 'feminine women 'against rejection of 'effeminate men 'and 'manly women', is nothing but a lame excuse to propagate fixed and rigid ideas about how one's gender dictates ones personality and life. Nothing can be further from the truth!
Even though both my parents belong to Assam, we were brought up in a very cosmopolitan Fauji environment. We could easily accept other languages and culture, religious ideas and philosophy with an open heart and mind. Nothing was forced upon us by our parents just because we are Assamese or because we are girls! We were free to be what we wanted to be!
Traditional and patriarchal ideas need to give way and we need to accept that we must, as parents, bring up our sons and daughters as individuals and not try to jam them into stereotype moulds! Son or daughter, both need our love, care and respect as an individual.
Each one of us has an identity besides our gender! A woman is a mother, sister, wife or daughter, because she was born a woman. What about her as an individual? What are her dreams, aspirations, desires? Therefore, each one of us is a unique individual and we are more than just 'Men from Mars' or 'Women from Venus'!
My daughters love 'blue' clothes and my husband loves his pink shirt! Gender has nothing to do with personal choice or aspirations.
Let the children grow up without being judged for their preferences and choices. Encourage them to be their true selves and appreciate them for what they are. Encourage them to be better versions of themselves not duplicates of someone else. Let them be what they are and not what others want them to be. They don't have to try to fit in just because they are expected to.
Say NO to stereotypes!
Say YES to freedom to BE!
Celebrate being original, being unique!
Excellent post 👍 high time we end stereotyping children...